


Masters Of Their Fates

by star_named_andy



Series: Shakespeare Does a Funny Thing [9]
Category: The Hobbit (1977), The Hobbit (Jackson Movies), The Hobbit - All Media Types, The Hobbit - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Emotions, Fluff, M/M, References to Shakespeare, fair funtime!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-02
Updated: 2015-05-02
Packaged: 2018-03-28 17:26:02
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,251
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3863137
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/star_named_andy/pseuds/star_named_andy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The anniversary showing of Magic Mike has arrived, meaning Bard, Thranduil, Bilbo, and Thorin will be spending some quality time together. Before the movie, however, Bilbo manages to get his way - they're all going to the fair! Will it all be fun and games, or will there be something more that the bright lights will expose?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Masters Of Their Fates

**Author's Note:**

> I think this is a pretty fun part of the series, so I hope you guys enjoy their antics! ^-^ And yes, there will be much more Bagginshield in this part!
> 
> (Disclaimer: I do not own the Hobbit, Lord of the Rings, or any of its characters or content. I also make no claims to owning any of William Shakespeare's work.)

By now it was almost the end of June and the day of Magic Mike’s release anniversary arrived. The couples, Bard and Thranduil and Bilbo and Thorin, met in Durinstown for dinner before the movie screening; though Bilbo didn’t live in Durinstown, he’d clearly spent enough time there to treat it as his home because he prattled on and on about the best attractions in town while Thorin added his two cents in here and there when he deemed it necessary. Bard couldn’t blame him for being as quiet as he was, seeing as it was generally difficult to get a word in edgewise when Bilbo was around, but Bard still got the feeling that Thorin was the more reclusive of the pair Bilbo when it came to socializing with people he barely knew. In fact, he knew this was true from hearing Bilbo rant about how Thorin _just loved_ to hang around with all of his college buddies and go drunk bowling and mini-golfing, but when it was Bilbo’s friends they were hanging out with, the brawny, bearded man turned utterly sheepish and clingy. Bard could sympathize with him; if he were to be thrust into hanging out with Thranduil’s cluster of friends, he wouldn’t want to be left alone for a second. The thought snuck its way into Bard’s head as Bilbo was going on about some haberdashery which sold “the most darling buttons ever made” and it concerned him. He had no idea what Thranduil’s inner circle was truly liked or what they would think of him – all he knew was that they, and Thranduil, liked to party and _Bard didn’t._

It was obviously no secret that Thranduil enjoyed drowning himself in intoxication and he was of age to do so. Bard himself was creeping toward that legal age, but he wasn’t planning anything major like getting so smashed that he couldn’t tell his right foot from his left. He’d seen too many blundering drunks to be interested in drinking all that much, and that included Thranduil. All of this known, Bard often felt the urge to say something to Thranduil about his habits because he drank _often_ , or so he guessed from the growing collection of drunken text messages and pictures Thranduil always sent him. He admitted, it was annoying when those barrages of nonsensical messages came two, three, and sometimes four times a week only because it happened a lot. He wasn’t certain how to judge how frequently was too frequently for Thranduil to be drinking, and besides, who was he to tell Thranduil what he could and couldn’t do? The whole thing was troublesome to think about because his heart was combatting his head on what he should do, if he should do anything at all. Would things get worse when school and the parties started back up again? Had Thranduil always been this way?

“Bard?” Thranduil’s voice drew Bard from the mess of conflict swirling in his head and he looked upon that divine face that stared at him with concern.

“Hm?”

“Are you alright? You look a little spacey.”

“Yes, I’m alright.” Bard said, summoning a smile and gently pulling Thranduil down to him so he could easily lay a gentle kiss his forehead.

“Thorin, I didn’t know there was a fair in town!” Bilbo proclaimed, jumping up and down as he pointed eagerly to a poster plastered on one of the town square’s shop windows. Thorin gave a simple nod with one hand in his pocket and the other stroking the back of Bilbo’s head.

“The fair comes every year, B. You know that.”

“B? That’s cute.” Thranduil commented so only Bard could hear.

“Isn’t it early?” Bilbo questioned.

“Hm…I guess so. Usually they don’t roll around until July has started, but it’s almost July.” Thorin answered with a shrug and his eyes widened as Bilbo came suddenly nose to nose with him.

“Aren’t we lucky?! We can go today!”

“ _Today?”_ Thorin asked, grinning the brightest he had all day as he nuzzled their noses together and Bilbo giggled and pressed their lips together through his pleas.

“Yes, today! Please?” _Kiss_. “Please?” _Smooch_. “Please?” _Peck_. “Please?” This time Bilbo was facing Bard and Thranduil and Bard put his hand up.

“No kiss for me, thanks.” He mocked and Bilbo frowned at him.

“ _Of course not for you!_ Only for my big bear!” he said, curling his arm around Thorin tightly and kissing his beard. “I think its fate that the fair has come early so we can all go together!”

“B, maybe they don’t want to.” Thorin proposed and Bard and Thranduil exchanged a look as Bilbo stared at them puppy-eyed.

“I don’t mind if you don’t.” Bard said.

“Neither do I.” Thranduil replied and Bilbo clapped his hands together.

“Perfect, we’re going! And we’ll be back in time for the movie and _then_ dinner!”

“Bilbo, you’re going to fill yourself up with sweets if we do that. Have you even gone to the dentist yet?” Thorin interjected.

“Yes, I did.” Thorin poked Bilbo’s cheek and he squealed. “Hey, that hurts!”

“You need to get those cavities taken care of, but in the mean time you shouldn’t be eating cotton candy and popcorn.”

“Don’t be a big poop!”

“You’re only going to make it worse.”

“I won’t eat any sweets then.”

Bard and Thorin both exchanged an unconvinced look, both knowing well that Bilbo had little self-control when it came to sweets, before settling it on Bilbo, who looked very appalled as he realized what they were thinking. He linked arms with Thranduil and yelled off about how “deeply offended” he was and that “Thranduil was the only nice one”, so they’d be walking together until Bilbo stopped his dramatic show of pouting. Thranduil looked back at Bard over his shoulder with an amused expression; Bard was grateful Thranduil didn’t seem to mind Bilbo’s strange company.

They drove the short distance to the fairgrounds and Bard was pretty sure Thorin had been giving them weird looks through his rear-view mirror, probably seeing that he and Thranduil were acting like buffoons with the windows down and blasting Britney Spears through Bard’s speakers.

Once they were admitted, they quickly found out that it was _packed_. It was opening day, according to the flyer Bard had been handed, and it surely showed. Bard and Thranduil stuck very close together, as did Bilbo and Thorin, to avoid bumping into others meandering around aimlessly and distractedly with toys and mountains of fried foods and sweets in their arms. Bilbo whined as he eyed all of the food and took in the delicious scents bombarding him, so Thorin steered him toward the first game they came across to distract him and save his apparently damaged tooth for just a bit longer. The game was labeled “STRENGTH TESTER”, a game in which the player had to smack the base of a tower as hard as they could with a hammer in hopes of shooting a puck up to the very top of the tower and ringing the bell that resided there. The prizes looked quite ridiculous, ranging from blow up plastic hammers, aliens and ponies to big eyed stuffed animals.

“Step right up, fellas, step right up! Test your strength and see who of you are men and who are the boys!” the game attendant said, trying to entice them into throwing money his way.

It was obvious Thorin didn’t appreciate the comment, but he paid to play the game anyway. He pushed up his sleeves, revealing the massive amount of hair on his arms, and he lifted the hammer with Bilbo jumping up and down and cheering him on from behind. With a big breath, Thorin heaved the hammer down onto the base and the puck shot up right to the top with a loud ringing and lights flashing. Bilbo screamed giddily, clapping his hands and latching onto his boyfriend with his leg popped up into the air. Thorin wore a very pleased grin as Bilbo sorted through the prizes to pick what he wanted and eventually, he pointed toward a stuffed daisy flower with a smiley face and the game attendant happily handed it over to him. Bilbo hugged the smiley flower tight and then pecked Thorin on the cheek, his face glowing with gratitude.

“Damn, he’s strong for a little guy.” Thranduil said to Bard, but Bard wasn’t the only one to hear it. Thorin’s bright blue eyes flashed right to him. Bard froze at how cold Thorin’s stare was, but Thranduil seemed unaffected.

“What did you say?” Thorin asked and Bilbo rolled his eyes.

“Thorin-” he tried, but Thorin cut him right off with rising volume.

“ _Little guy?_ Maybe I’m not little, you’re just freakishly tall!”

“I didn’t mean it to be offensive. I said you were strong.” Thranduil said with a shrug and Bard wanted to disappear; he _loathed_ tension like this.

“Yeah, he didn’t mean it like you think, Thorin.” Bilbo added and Thorin grumbled something under his breath, turning away and then being quickly distracted as Bilbo started floating toward a candied apple stand. He chased after him and Bard flailed his arms, catching Thranduil’s attention.

“What?” the blonde asked innocently.

“Thorin _hates_ when people make comments about his size; he’s really not that short, just a little below average.”

“It’s not a bad thing that he’s short, it’s just the obvious truth, but I wouldn’t say I’m _freakishly_ tall. That’s not necessarily true.”

“Just spare the guys feelings, hm?”

“If it’s a big deal I won’t say anything more about it…or should I say a _little_ deal?”

“Thran, no!” Bard squeaked and Thranduil laughed, pulling him into a hug and kissing his temple.

“I’m just kidding around, babe. I won’t say a word.”

Thranduil kept his promise as they followed Bilbo and Thorin to the cotton candy stand and to many other food vendors that Bilbo kept running off to every time Thorin wasn’t looking, unless Thorin was playing a game to win him another cute gift, because Bilbo was far too interested in watching Thorin win again and again no matter how long it took him just so Bilbo could have another prize to carry around. Watching their behavior really was quite entertaining for both Bard and Thranduil because they were an adorable couple to watch. Thranduil thought Bilbo was absolutely the cutest thing, given by the comments he kept whispering to Bard, and he even shared his fried dough, topped with plenty of powder, with him. He made the justification that the snack would be the best for Bilbo out of all of the food available at the fair since it was soft, quieting Thorin’s protests to only soft grumbles. Bard found it all pretty amusing ad was happy overall that everyone was getting along okay so far, despite the “little” incident by the strength tester.

Bilbo chose to partake in game playing himself when he found ones he really liked and if he failed after a few tries, he would hand the reigns over to Thorin. Bard and Thranduil indulged too, but they hardly took it as seriously as Bilbo and Thorin did. In fact, they were goofing off so much that Thranduil nearly stuck a dart in the poor game attendant’s head while playing balloon pop. Thranduil’s first instinct was to gasp in response and then burst out into laughter, apologizing profusely to the poor girl who looked utterly frightened. She ended up giving them a pair of toy monkeys whose hands were velcroed together, probably in hopes of sending them away permanently. Between the two of them, they had won a few teensy prizes they gave one another, but then the big daddy of all prizes came into view and Thranduil wanted it _so bad_.

He didn’t say a word and Bard knew just by how big Thranduil’s eyes got when he set his sight on the giant, plush elk toy hanging with the rest of the large prizes. He looked simply amazed and gave a little whimper.

“It’s so cute,” he said near breathlessly, never taking his eyes from the smiling elk with shining, black button eyes.

“Done and done.” Bard said with a nod of his head and approached the game counter with confidence. There was _no possible way_ he could lose this one. Fate had aligned this, for sure – it was a crossbow shooting game. He was going to practically _steal_ that damn elk from the rack. “One round, please.” Bard said and the game attendant gave him a doubtful look.

“Just one? You might need more than that.” He said.

“I don’t think so.” Bard replied with a smirk and the attendant shrugged, taking Bard’s money and then giving him the crossbow.

“In order to shoot-”

“I know how, don’t worry.”

“Okay, all-star. Take your best shot.”

And that’s just what Bard intended to do. Bilbo was giggling behind him, nudging Thranduil and Thorin on the arms playfully as they were all in on the secret. Thranduil was smirking with his arms folded and shook his head in amusement at Bard’s cockiness.

“Yeah, all-star. Go ahead.” The blonde coaxed and Bard flashed him a grin over his shoulder.

The target wasn’t even as far away as the standard distance he usually competed at. This was a joke. Bard easily handled the weapon and released the arrow, sending it flying and landing it in the dead center of the target. Cheers and applause rang out from his friends behind him and even from a few very impressed onlookers. The game attendant looked embarrassed, to say the least, and retrieved the elk for him as Bard pointed to it. The brunette then handed off the giant toy to his beloved, whose eyes lit up as he held the massive stuffed animal. He was quiet, content, and giving Bard the biggest and most childish smile he’d donned in a long time. He was so filled with joy, he couldn’t seem to conjure any words, so je just nuzzled his face in Bard’s hair and Bard took it as a “thank you”.

Thranduil, with his arm hooked around Bard’s, pressed himself close to his brunette boyfriend as they walked side by side with his head occasionally tipping down to rest on top of Bard’s. He seemed blissfully tranquil; had he really wanted the elk _that much_ , Bard wondered? It sent him over the moon in regards to happiness, but Bard didn’t mind. If an elk toy would bring Thranduil that much delight, then Bard would go get him a real one if he wanted it.

Thorin had had his fill of games by now and finally drifted toward the rides with Bilbo hesitantly whining behind him, not even wanting to go near any of them. He volunteered to be the official prize holder so Thorin, Bard and Thranduil could go on the rides, but Thranduil claimed he wasn’t dying to go on any rides, not overly fond of them, but not afraid of them. He gave Bard the go ahead, insisting that he kept dear little Bilbo company and vowing not to feed him any goodies while Thorin and Bilbo were enjoying the rollercoasters and other ridiculous, absurd, upside down and whirly contraptions that made Bilbo shudder.

Bard felt guilty about leaving the two alone, but once the safety bars came down over him and Thorin and the rollercoaster car moved forward, he instantly snapped into adrenaline mode.

“You don’t get sick on rollercoasters, do you?” Thorin asked a bit uneasily and Bard grinned.

“Not usually.”

“ _Usually?_ ”

The next sounds that came flying out of their mouths were screams as they plummeted down a steep slope and then shot straight into being spun upside down, right side up, and then right side up again. They went around sharp turns that turned into more deep plunges, and by the time the car stopped their heads were spinning. They stood and stumbled into each other, holding onto each other and the railings provided unashamedly so they wouldn’t fall on their faces. Both of them had been on plenty of rollercoasters before, but _wow was that one a monster_.

When Thranduil came into view, Bard happily fell into his arms for reprieve and Thorin did the same with Bilbo.

“That was particularly bad,” Thorin commented with a shaky huff of his breath before standing upright again.

“Boy, I sure am glad I didn’t go on it. You look awful, big bear. You okay?” Bilbo said as he caressed Thorin’s paled face worriedly and Thorin smiled faintly at him.

“I’ll be okay, just a bit dizzy still. Let’s find somewhere to sit.”

“I can’t move.” Bard said resolutely and the eyes of the group were then on him. Thranduil stroked through Bard’s curls in attempts to soothe him.

“Are you exaggerating? If you really don’t feel like moving, I’ll carry you.” Thranduil offered. Bard would have shaken his head, but he feared he’d spew vomit if he did. It was easier to just speak in response, but that made him even more fearful of puke because his mouth was open.

“Can’t at all. Everything is… _oh man_.”

“Bard?” Thranduil’s voice was sterner now as he beckoned his boyfriend back to attention, needing to know if he was able to respond to him properly. Bard didn’t say anything. Instead he pushed away from Thranduil and spun his head around in the other direction as he felt a rush of warmth crawling up his throat and then it came; disgusting, hot, burning bile straight out of his mouth and onto the ground. He was certainly embarrassed, but he felt so sick that he didn’t care. He purged himself with Thranduil stroking his back and Bilbo muttering words of sympathy in the background while somehow holding onto Thranduil’s elk in addition with all of his toys. Once he was finally done, Bilbo’s hand appeared before him with a few napkins. Bard was overjoyed at the sight and delicately wiped his mouth clean. He hadn’t gotten any on his clothes, thank god, but he was sure his breath smelled foul. He turned to Thranduil who looked very calm and it made him feel awful rather than comforted. He pouted his lips and Thranduil gave him a sympathetic “ _Awww_.” as he pulled him into a gentle hug.

“Don’t be embarrassed. I think now you’ll feel a lot better now that you got it all out…you did get it all out, didn’t you?”

“Yes, I think so.” Bard admitted begrudgingly.

“Do you feel better?”

“Mm…I guess.”

“Hey, you’ve seen me puke. Now we’re even.”

“ _Please!_ ” Bard scoffed as he looked at his fair faced angel. “You gave a little cough and a spit and that was all!”

“Hah, you didn’t see what happened after I was out of your sight. I left a nice little mess in the corridor of your dorm and I ran away without telling a soul. I’d only just known you and I didn’t want you to see me like that, but now I don’t care, as long as you hold my hair for me, that is.” Thranduil gave him a sweet, yet devilish smirk that forced a smile out of Bard.

“Ditto.”

Thranduil helped Bard to his feet and the four of them found a bench to rest at. Bilbo offered Bard gum and he took it graciously. They sat until Bard and Thorin both regained their strength and were off to the next ride. Thranduil and Bilbo thought them insane to go jumping onto another ride, especially Thranduil seeing as Bard had just vomited, but Bard and Thorin _insisted_ the next ride wouldn’t be as bad. Luckily, they were right.

When they came to the spinning teacups, Bilbo stopped them and shyly said he was willing to try it if Thorin went with him. Of course, Thorin complied. Thranduil wanted to give it a go too, and so their collective prizes were stored in back of the ride operator’s booth. Thorin and Bilbo were ushered into a red, flower cup and Thranduil and Bard were crammed into an orange polka-dotted one; the teacups weren’t ideal for a person of Thranduil’s height with or without Bard accompanying him because his legs were so long. They both laughed at their obvious discomfort.

“I don’t even like this shade of orange.” Thranduil said, peering at the bright color painting the outside of their cup.

“Only burnt orange.” Bard said.

“You remembered.”

“Of course I did. Have you ever ridden these before?”

“Yes, I have.” The blonde answered, setting his grip on the wheel between them. “Will we be going on the ferris wheel?”

“Sure, we can. Do you like it?”

“Mm.”

A zinging sound went off, indicating that the ride was starting. Bard put his hands on the wheel and the cups started moving around each other over the swirl patterned floor. The speed was quick to increase, and Thranduil and Bard both worked in tandem to get their cup spinning at a nice pace. Bard sometimes slipped, the wheel rotating right out of his hands as he kept looking up at Thranduil’s concentrated expression. At one point he lost his grip and Thranduil started spinning the wheel so furiously that he couldn’t re-grab it. They must have been turning in the cup at maximum speed since Thranduil’s blonde hair was whipping around him. Bard latched his hands onto the wheel and he held it hard enough to slow it, but it hurt his hands quite a bit.

“Thran,” he said and Thranduil’s eyes shot up at him, as if woken from a daydream.

“I’m sorry – I just got excited, I think.” He spat out quickly.

“Alright.” Bard replied, not thoroughly convinced given Thranduil’s calm demeanor; he was a little more frantic now that he’d snapped from whatever trance he was in, but Bard wouldn’t press on the odd occurrence.

Bilbo was pleased after the ride was over and felt as if he could triumph the world if he wanted, but as soon as Thorin suggested he try a rollercoaster, his confidence diminished immensely. He claimed he was content just overcoming the teacups and Thorin was happy for him. Next for them was the fun house. Bard was pretty sure this attraction was designed for children, but he wouldn’t say anything to squash Bilbo’s eagerness. They climbed up the steps to a bridge that would lead them inside and apparently Bilbo and Thorin had decided that they were going to make getting through the house a race without telling Bard or Thranduil. They dashed ahead, leaving Bard and Thranduil highly confused and left in the dust.

“Well, come on, let’s go!” Thranduil said and grabbed Bard’s hand, yanking him ahead across the rickety bridge unfalteringly.

They entered the house and were met by a wall of tall, blue and yellow foam pillars that needed to be pushed through in order to get to the other side. They braved forward and shoved their way through, finding that the pillars were a lot harder to get by than they suspected since they bounced right back at you when they were pushed and they were heavier than expected. They could hear Bilbo wailing up ahead, god knows at what, and so they pushed ahead.

“You good back there?” Thranduil teased.

“I’m right behind you.” Bard said and slapped Thranduil’s butt to show how close he was. Thranduil didn’t turn, but he did giggle at the gesture.

When they emerged from the minefield of pillars, they saw an inclined, padded wall with knobs and ropes on it for escalating to the top ahead which Bilbo was trying to get up. Thorin was already at the top, reaching for his boyfriend and encouraging him. They both snapped their heads toward Thranduil and Bard who were coming up on their tail and Bilbo shouted something in despair and Thorin made some kind of dramatic response; they were both obviously _really_ wanting to win the race they initiated for whatever reason.

Thranduil pounced on the wall, latching onto it precisely like a cat digging in his claws for a good grip. Bilbo cried out, making Thranduil laugh and Bard was now on the wall too. Thorin grabbed Bilbo’s arm.

“Bilbo, you can do it! I’ve got you!” he said and Bilbo shook his head.

“I-I don’t think I can make it! Go on without me, big bear! You must live on in my stead!”

“I’m not leaving you behind!”

Thranduil and Bard shamelessly ripped out laughter at the cheesy, romantic drama scene ensuing above them and couldn’t climb any further because they were laughing so hard, giving Bilbo and Thorin the perfect window of escape.

“Wow, they’re too much!” Thranduil managed, wiping a tear from his eye and Bard’s chuckle died off.

“They really are; come on, let’s finish this thing.”

They scaled the wall side by side, making it up easily and then sliding down the other side. Landing on their feet, they started running down the hall ahead and smoke started fuming from of the wall. It thickened quickly and they found each other’s hands to get through the hindrance safely. When the smoke cleared, they were in a hall of mirrors, not all of which gave flattering appearances; most of them were bent just so to distort figures and faces to look silly. Being the two goofballs that they were, they had to stop and admire their big heads and their overly widened hips in the reflections.

“Oh my _god!_ ” Thranduil mused as he turned and made his butt look absolutely ginormous. “Would you prefer if I had an ass this size?” he asked as he wiggled around, unable to take his eyes away from the bizarre image.

“I would never prefer anything other than your natural self.” Bard said as he wrapped his arms around Thranduil, meeting eyes with him in the mirror as he rested his head on the shoulder Thranduil wasn’t looking over to see himself in the reflection.

Thranduil turned his head back to where it normally sat so that he was face to face with his unbearably charming boyfriend who was giving him a grin for no reason other than he loved him. Thranduil smiled back, always lightened by Bard’s face, his voice, his touches; just Bard all together. It was then that they both realized they’d hardly been alone all day, and after being separated for a few days in their respective hometowns, they were yearning for some private time for more than one reason. They wanted to be lazy, cuddle, talk about mindless things that meant nothing and everything, watch movies whether they be garbage or masterpieces, and of course they wanted to feel each other up and get swept up in a storm of young passion.

They were drawn together in a kiss much more fiery than any they had shared in front of Bilbo and Thorin all day; after all it’s not like they had much time to catch up on their physical urges to ravage each other on the car ride to Durinstown. Their lust for their deepest level of intimacy had been suppressed for days now and they were both restless by now. Thranduil’s hands quickly groped at Bard’s sides and Bard’s at Thranduil’s not ginormous, but still incredibly magnificent ass. A muffled gasp of surprise was pushed out of Thranduil’s mouth and into Bards as he was pressed up against the mirror behind him. He gasped again, more audibly as his ass cheeks were squeezed roughly and Bard’s heaving breath lowered onto his neck.

“ _Bard!"_ Thranduil half squeaked and half moaned, very flustered and flattered by the spontaneity and location they were in. It felt a little scandalous to be engaging with each other in such a way when anyone could waltz through and see them.

“I hate missing you, Thran.” Bard professed lowly as he seized Thranduil’s skin with particularly possessive and hungry kisses that were sure to leave marks.

“Bard, stop; you know I can’t say no to you.” Thranduil said, but his tone did not sound at all serious.

“Oh, you can’t?” Bard asked amusedly and Thranduil giggled, lightly pushing him away, but moaning more each time Bard sucked his neck.

“ _I can’t._ ” the blonde breathed back in response, making Bard’s next advancement even more vicious. His hands rested on Thranduil’s hips to keep him steady against the mirror as he spread his love bites all over that slender, pale neck.

Thranduil moaned absently, taken by the moment, but all came to a silent halt when a foreign noise broke through their bubble. Thranduil’s head turned much faster than Bard’s and once he realized what the sound was, he practically shoved Bard off of him in a hurry and Bard stumbled back, stunned by Thranduil’s reaction and his strength combined. Thranduil had stomped off in the direction of the sound, going back into the smoke filled room and Bard swiftly followed after him, confused and not at all knowing what was going on. All he knew was that there was a noise and Thranduil felt compelled to go after it, but Bard hadn’t been able to make out what the sound was for himself.

“Thran?” Bard called, not able to see Thranduil clearly with a veil of smoke hovering in front of his eyes. He didn’t hear an answer from Thranduil, but he heard a soft crying.

“Hello? Is somebody in here?” Thranduil’s voice chimed in a devastatingly sweet voice that Bard didn’t even think it was his own boyfriend that had spoken at first, but there was no doubt it was him. “It’s alright, I just want to help you get through, okay?”

With that, Thranduil waved his hand powerfully so that the scenario around him could become more visible. His gut had been right; there was a poor little kid in the middle of the room alone and weeping to herself. Now that Bard could see what was going on, he approached Thranduil and the child slowly as not to frighten anyone. The little girl, who couldn’t have been any older than seven and was wearing a cute pink overalls ensemble, saw them both and stared up at them with large, watery eyes. Thranduil knelt to her and offered a smile.

“You don’t need to be afraid. We were just on our way out and we’d be happy to have such a beautiful little princess walk with us.” She grinned a little at being called a beautiful princess. “You’re not hurt, are you?”

“N-No,” the girl sniffled through her tears and wiped her nose. “My butt hurts a little from f-falling down the wall, but I th-think I’m o-o-okay. I wanna get out of here!”

“Let’s go, then. We’ll get you right back outside. You can hold my hand if you need to.” Just as Thranduil offered his hand, the girl grabbed it and he stood. “I’m Thranduil and this is my friend Bard.”

“Hi there.” Bard said, giving a bright grin and crouching a little to wave to her and she meekly waved back.

“Hi.” She peeped and then looked at Thranduil. “You name is what?”

“Thranduil.”

“T…T-Trandweel.”

“That’s close enough.” Thranduil chuckled.

“What’s your name?” Bard asked and started slowly forward with the girl between him and Thranduil.

“Claire.”

“Claire; that’s a very nice name.”

“Thank you. My mom and dad think so too.”

Thranduil kept Claire’s hand the whole time, and he and Bard were collectively relieved to see her smile and laugh at her funny reflection in the hall of mirrors. It turned out that that was the last of the fun house, except for the exit of course which took the form of a big slide. Bard was ordered down the slide first by Thranduil so he could show Claire it was safe and fun and Bard complied gladly. He gave a few extra excited hoots and hollers on the way down to encourage the girl and then waved her down. She and Thranduil both came gliding down with their joined hands raised in the air. Claire was laughing as the air pushed her ginger pigtails back and Thranduil cheered all the way to the end. He helped her hop down from the edge of the slide and an adult couple with a stroller occupied by a little boy came forward. Thranduil explained what happened, but he was sure to mention how brave Claire had been through the rest of their journey. Her parents thanked him and Bard excessively and Claire waved to them until she was lost in the crowd and could no longer see the two tall young men.

Bard turned to look at Thranduil who was still glowing and grinned wildly.

“What was that?” he asked and Thranduil set an innocent looking gaze on him.

“What?” he questioned.

“I didn’t know you were so good with kids.”

“Well, kids have never really come up in conversation and we’ve never been around them together.” Thranduil shrugged easily with a humble smile curving his lips.

“You were like a superhero, flying in there and making her light up like that. Daddy Thranduil to the rescue!”

“I couldn’t leave a princess in distress, Bard, and shame on you! You’re such a dirty bird for trying to seduce me in a children’s fun house. It’s not meant for _that_ kind of fun. Very inappropriate.”

“Mmhm, I’m _sorry_.” Bard said sarcastically, picking up on Thranduil’s all too sarcastic tone and throwing it right back at him.

Before reuniting with Thorin and Bilbo, who questioned why they were in the fun house for so long (seeing Thranduil’s neck gave them a bit of an answer), Thranduil had one more thing to do in order to resolve the Claire situation. He marched himself right up to the fun house attendant and made a burning speech loud enough for everyone waiting in line to hear about how the smoke room was dangerous for children and how he demanded it be shut down until it was fixed or at least that the smoke machines be turned off. The attendant frantically went to making sure the smoke machines wouldn’t go off again, quite intimidated by Thranduil’s height, his deep voice and his blatant anger about what had occurred in the fun house. After the problem had been resolved, Thranduil returned to normal. Bard was impressed, rattled to his core, to say the least. Thranduil really was an all-powerful angel who had the power to comfort and rescue those in need and then turn around and become a new force to be reckoned with, unleashing his wrath to ensure justice was served.

Bilbo found the story of Claire to be most endearing and Bard was sure to give all the credit to Thranduil, but he didn’t treat it as a big deal. The sky was beginning to fall dim and movie time was ticking closer and closer, so they had time left for only one last thing. They meandered toward the brightly illuminated ferris wheel and when it was their turn to climb into the cars, he couples split ways and each took separate ones to have a subtle air of romance with their significant others. They were able to bring their prizes with them, and now that Thranduil’s elk had been put back in his arms he wasn’t letting it go. The giant wheel slowly starting rolling upward and Thranduil pet his precious, large stuffed animal’s head.

“Thank you for this.” Thranduil said and intertwined his free hand with Bard’s.

“You were giving it googley eyes and it was a _crossbow_ shoot for god’s sake; it was meant to be. You two were destined to be together.”

“Do you really believe in destiny?”

“Hm…I suppose I do sometimes, but not wholeheartedly. I think maybe that destiny plays a part in people’s lives, but that doesn’t mean people can’t change their own lives themselves. Men, at some time, are masters of their fates, as Shakespeare says. ”

“I think that’s a very wise assumption.”

“And you?”

“I like to believe in the power of human beings, but sometimes it seems like a bleak effort. I guess that’s where I’d like to think destiny steps in. I don’t like to think people are bad on their own will.”

“Oh? That’s an interesting thought.” Bard said, intrigue tinting his tone and raising his brow. Thranduil was an enigma that was constantly unraveling, and he was doing a lot of said unraveling on this day in specific.

“It is, but just because I don’t like to think that people are bad on their own will doesn’t mean it’s not true. That’s just a better excuse for people doing horrible things than the person just doing it just because or because of stupid reasons.” Thranduil explained.

“If that hope of yours was real, that destiny was the reason why there are bad people in the world, then maybe the sheer will of others can change the bad people for the better despite destiny.”

“Maybe, given that destiny is real at all.”

“If it is, do you think that’s what brought us together? Given that destiny can do more than just make people bad and that is, in fact, real.”

“No, I don’t think it was destiny at all and it was obviously neither of our wills that brought us together. I think it must have been an act of sheer, dumb luck.”

They both had to laugh at that only because that seemed like the most probable explanation for their convergence, and boy, were they both happy for whatever force that let them meet. Their car was slowly approaching the top of the wheel and Bard was wishing it was darker so that they could see a sky full of stars when they reached it.

“So, do you want to have children someday?” Bard asked, reclining in the hard plastic seat with his hand no longer bound to Thranduil’s; instead, he put his arm around him.

“I’ve thought about it. It depends on the situation.”

“How so?”

“If I were to ever marry a woman, having children would be a lot easier. If I married a man, however, things would be more difficult. We’d have to adopt or have a surrogate mother carry a child for us.”

“You’re bisexual?”

“I don’t really know. I like men a lot, but I don’t object to ever being with a woman or any other gender if I like them enough.”

“Makes sense to me.”

“If for some reason I ended up with you, the decision on whether or not to have children would be hard.”

“Why’s that?”

“I bet you’d be a wonderful father, but I’m not sure I’d want to share you with anyone else.” Thranduil answered, giving Bard an adoring smile, but it didn’t last very long. “I’m not sure I’d be such a good dad, myself.”

“ _Psh!_ Were you possessed by some spirit earlier? Do you not remember what you did for that little girl?”

“But that’s different. I’m not tucking her in every night and waking up to her every day. I can never really know what it’s like to raise a child until the time comes that I actually have one…you know, my dad and I used to come to the fair a lot when I was younger.”

Bard froze stupidly in his seat at the mention of Thranduil’s father. This was it, _holy crap_ , he thought! _Finally_ , Thranduil was going to talk about his family which Bard knew almost nothing about; he didn’t even know his parents’ names and guessed he’d seen a picture of them once, but he hardly remembered what they looked like if it really was them within the picture frame in Thranduil’s dorm room. He was nearly shaking with excitement, all ears and ready for whatever Thranduil would say about his mysterious life at home with his family.

“It’s been ages since we’ve done anything like that, though, and I haven’t been to the fair since the last time we went.” Thranduil went on.

“That’s nice that you two did that together. Did your mom ever go with you?”

“Sometimes, but it was usually just he and I. She doesn’t like the crowds, the smells, the food, the rides…any of it, really. My dad and I went every year since I was…maybe three or four, I’d say. I don’t know why he ever took me in the first place because he doesn’t seem like a man who’d enjoy a fair. We used to go on the ferris wheel every year. It was his favorite. He never said a word while we were on it and he always paid the guy running it to stop it at the top so we could look at the stars, and sometimes there were fireworks.”

“That’s so sweet of him.” Bard beamed. “How come you don’t go anymore? Too grown up for daddy-son time?” Bard teased, but Thranduil’s expression didn’t change.

“We don’t go anymore because he doesn’t like me anymore, Bard.”

Bard froze again, but now for an entirely different reason. Something in the atmosphere had changed, and it didn’t feel good.

“What do you mean he doesn’t like you anymore? A parent doesn’t just stop liking or loving their child.” Bard protested, but Thranduil’s jaw tightened, he closed his eyes, and he pointed his nose up in the air.

“Well, I suppose he isn’t much of a parent then.” He said brusquely, but then he corrected himself. “No, I _know_ he isn’t.”

“You two don’t get along?” Bard asked quietly.

“I shouldn’t have mentioned it. It’s stupid.” Thranduil said, obviously dodging the question and taking in a sharp breath. His eyes were closed, but Bard swore he saw a tear squeeze out and trickle down Thranduil’s cheek before he wiped it away. Before Bard could open his mouth, Thranduil beat him to the punch. “It’s been fun here today with you and your friends and I’m glad we came. I like Bilbo a lot.”

“Thran, are you-”                            

“Whatever it is you’re going to say, please just _don’t_.” And that was the end of it. Thranduil didn’t open his eyes, not even when Bard told him they reached the top.

When their car lowered back to the beginning and they joined back up with Bilbo and Thorin, Thranduil was acting normally as he had earlier, letting Bilbo talk his ear off, smiling, and adding his input whenever Bilbo took a breath; he was acting as if nothing happened and Bard was feeling very strange.

What the hell had just happened?

Thranduil had just started opening up about his family life, which he’d strived to keep hidden from Bard (that’s how Bard perceived it), and then he’d cried just a tear and forced everything to a stop. Besides feeling incredibly confused, Bard also felt purely awful for bringing Thranduil to the fair, since it stirred some kind of unpleasant memories in his beloved. Was he miserable? What was he thinking? What was he feeling? Was he angry about being at the fair? Angry at _him_? Upset? How had things come to take such a drastic turn?

Bard wanted to ask him so many questions and hold him while he opened the remainder of his inner personal walls, but Thranduil was obviously not going to allow that easily.

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> I just felt the need to say that the little girl's name is Claire since I just recently re-watched The Breakfast Club; random, I know. xD Haha.  
> Anyway, YES. Things are happening!!


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